04 March 2008

The rage, the RAGE!

I have been bottling it up for the last two days, but can contain myself no longer. I am absolutely FURIOUS that Michelle Gayle wasn't selected as our entry for Eurovision this year and instead we're stuck with an unattractive binman with his trousers up under his nipples like he's about 60.

I just can't understand how it happened! Michelle clearly had the better song, it was dead catchy and it had a dance routine and everything. In fact my friends and I had already agreed we were going to learn the dance routine in time for the final, we were that sure she was going to win.

And to my delight Andy Knobhead got eliminated, quite rightly, by the judges in the initial rounds. And then in a shocking moment of ill judgment, Terry Wogan reinstated him as the wild card. Never mind, I thought, she'll still win no problem. It came down to a head to head between the two of them, all the judges said they thought Michelle should win, and then there was a bizarre reality-warping moment where Andy came out the winner! What the hell???

I wouldn't mind that much, but consider this as a proposition:
The Ukranian entry, called Igor or whatever, swans onto stage and they introduce him as a former binman, and then he launches into song, and you think "hang on, this is EXACTLY the same as Madonna - Express Yourself. You can actually sing the lyrics over the top! What did he do, find a CD of it in someone's bin and think 'I'll have that'???"

Because that's exactly the same as what we've done! His song is a complete rip off, the Europeans are bound to have heard of it, backwards though they are, and they're going to completely muller us for it.

So now I'm stuck with trying to find a different country to support this year. Ireland's out because they've chosen a stuffed turkey that looks like a penis to sing their song. So who am I going to support, the French???? Over my dead body!

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